Play by play:

Forgets we were supposed to be having a test that day. Comes in 20 minutes late - good on her, usually it’s just 10 minutes - and then yells at us. How dare we? It’s none of her business if we’re having a test. We change dates often, so if we can, so can she? (We can change the date after the test has already started? Good to know.) Naturally, it’s our fault that she forgot.

What happens if we forget, hmm? Just try with a little visualisation.

Generally, she never returns the tests when she’s supposed to. She just didn’t have the time to check if 30 words on each test are written correctly. I mean, seriously! She had so much to do! She’s the school coordinator, you know. And there was that field trip and the other one… We understand. (Can’t you just smell the sarcasm?) There’s always something. God forbid we’re a day late with our paper… “Oh no, no, no!! That just can’t be! A mark less, sorry dear child. You should have learnt order and responsibilities.” Why can everybody else do it? Why are we required to do it? Practice what you preach? “If you can’t handle school AND hobbies, school comes first! Responsibilities, remember?” - or so we are told.

Much, much hypocrisy steams out of her.

I hate not being able to sleep, I almost feel crippled by it. I don’t know if it is a messed up biorythm or some actual problems, but Mr. Sandman just doesn’t feel the need to drop by. Who knows, maybe he’s afraid of my rats, or Giger’s art makes him uncomfortable. Maybe he just wants me to be up, I never write anything of value during the day, Kette never feels as meaningful during the day, magic is never as present during the day.

I love what December does to towns and cities, not to people because people turn hideous in December, but all the lights are sweet. They give everything a more surreal, fairy tale-ish feeling. It is also a great time to be happily in love. I’m honestly joyfull when I see my friends like that lately, they deserve it.

I like people who turn younger in December. Laughing, smiling, runing around, enjoying life. I don’t like the people who can’t talk of anything other than presents, money and the crowd in stores. I say: “Make something instead, you don’t have to buy it.” they respond with an excuse about not having any time or something equally silly. I used to like making presents… But then, once, a teddy bear that I worked really hard on, ended up behind a closet on the floor. I doubt it ever even got a second look. Being caught off guard like that, I never know now, who appreciates such things and who doesn’t. It cost me the courage to create something for a birthday or Christmas. My mistake is mostly, that I assume people appreciate the time and work invested in it more, than something quicly picked up from a store, with a brand or a meaningless thing like that. People are different… And as a friend of mine keeps banging in my head: “Don’t assume.”

One of the many reasons why I don’t really like people as such.

I decided that making this blog at least a little bit more personal wasn’t such a bad idea. It was tweaked a little, but after seeing 5 blogs that looked aproximately the same (surprise?), I decided now’s the time. I went on a quest to find a photograph of a waterlily that I could use legaly. It took about an hour but I got it!

A nightmare followed. I’m not that bad with GIMP… When it comes to playing around at least, when I don’t have anything specific to work with. I think I blogged about my memory once before, well it isn’t any better when it comes to practical things. I am completely capable of forgeting how to make a frame or in this case, how to cut out a picture neatly. It took me 5 hours before I gave up. (Can you tell I’m blushing?) In the end, Dacho came to the rescue, snatching the lily out in less than 5 minutes. I still haven’t come to terms with that… -_-’

However, the blog is little more mine now. Who knows, perhaps someday I will even remember some basic html and re-make it entirely. (Riiiiight.)

I love Vlado Kreslin. His music goes right to the soul, his velveten voice just sends shivers down my spine. I like the simple melody, the lyrics that are easy to understand, but full of meaning once you think about them. I can’t sit still or be quiet when I hear his songs.

A friend called me the other day, asked me if I’d like to go see his December show in Cankarjev Dom - bliss in a bottle! I can’t wait, I’ve wanted to see it for years and never came around to it. Too many other things to see… I’ve been at Kreslin’s concert twice. Both times at Rock Otočec - bliss in a larger bottle, with mud at the bottom and an Ode to Krka printed on the label.

So for short, I can’t wait for Thursday.

I’ve gotten quite fond of old movies in these past few weeks. Irritated by the Deep Blue Something song, I decided that Breakfast At Tiffany’s is just something that needs to be seen. It definitely wasn’t a bad idea, being sick and stuck at home, it provided the entertainment needed and I ended up falling in love with it.

Audrey Hepburn somehow pulls off the naive, innocent blonde act without making it seem too stereotypical or clichée. Everything in her world looks so simple, she carries her heart on the sleeve, is an open book and generally the most convincing extrovert that I have seen. She reminded me of that Baz Luhrmann song, Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen), where he says: “Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.“ Or that famous Scarlet O’Hara quote, going: “I can’t think abou that now, I’ll think about it tomorrow.” Worrying only for one split second, what’s going to happen to her dear brother, which seems to be the only thing she really cares about.

George Peppard on the other hand, plays a man that is more of an introvert. He sees right through Holly, the “Wild Thing” act and through the easygoing personality. Unfortunately that’s the message of the film, that on the surface she fights off stability in her life but deep down she just wants a home, a family and a man. The man obviously being Fred - Paul Varjak. Romantic in a way, I suppose, but not today, I’m feeling feministic.

A well acted movie to relax to.

I have a horrible memory, I really do. Birthdays are something I hate, they always slip my mind… Which, needless to say, annoys people. Last year I got a datebook so I would at least rememeber tests if nothing else. It only half worked, I remembered tests… IF I remembered to look in the datebook. I got a new one this year. It doesn’t do much good, but it looks pretty. Flower Fairy’s Secret Diary For Any Year - I love fairies.

With or without it… This is what my memory looks like in practice:

Friend #1 : I forgot her birthday 5 years in a row. Embarassing.

Friend #2 : I woke up every day, for two weeks, with the thought: “Oh shit! I forgot her birthday!” Two weeks prior to the birthday, of course. Guess what I did on her birthday…

Dad: That one’s a gem. All of a sudden, during English class, I think: “Crap! His birthday was yesterday!” I come home all sad and then am told that his birthday is actually the next day and that I forgot one of my friends again. They’re two days apart.

My problem is mainly that I have no sense of time. Sometimes I find myself walking down the street and everything seems eternal. It’s a funny feeling, not feeling time.

I ask forgiveness.